The value of the pause

The value of the pause

I've been on the road for just over a week. Celebrating a wedding, enjoying beloved family and friends, basking in the warmth sunshine, eating good food, forest bathing, and coastal sightseeing complete with harbor seal pups and Gray whales. It has been joy-filled and breathtaking.

When I'm in motion for a sustained amount of time like this, I notice that when I lie down at night, I feel as if I am still in trajectory down the highway: a persistent hum in my ears, vibration in my cells, an alert agitation.

One particularly long driving day, despite my exhaustion, I couldn't sleep initially because of this agitated energy. So I put on a yoga nidra recording and feel asleep before the recording ended.

The yoga nidra practice (often called "yogic sleep") allowed me to pause... return my body to a blessed state of inertia and reset my thoughts into a quieter, rest-inducing pattern. There are many ways to access a peaceful mind-body, of course. Yoga nidra is just one.

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Carry on, my friends

Carry on, my friends

The past week did not go as planned. This is an understatement.

Does this ever happen to you? Does it feel like the gods and goddesses of space and time are laughing at you? Can you eventually laugh at yourself?

I’m a planner and a doer. (Many of you may have heard me say, “I get shit done.”) And, I know very well about myself that I get attached to things going a certain way. Even after 2+ pandemic years of relentless practice not being in control, I still have a hard time accepting that I am not in control of all the things. This week was another solid lesson in this practice.

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Beauty for Your Inbox

Beauty for Your Inbox

Dear friends,

And so I begin a conscious intention to bring some beauty to your inbox.

It is true that there is unfathomable horror in the world.
It is also true that there is profound and breathtaking beauty.

Current events and headlines make it feel heartbreakingly skewed towards the former. I want to offer the latter. Not to pretend the horror doesn’t exist, but to keep us resilient and steadfast. Each of us is needed, today and tomorrow.

Beauty, simplicity, and ease are possibly the most precious touchstones I have for my work right now. So in that vein, I am starting here. From where I am: yogi, web designer, photographer.

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Happy Solstice!

Happy Solstice!

Happy Solstice! We've made it to the shortest day and longest night of the year. In the Pacific Northwest, that is no small feat for those of us who are heavily influenced by the short gray, rainy days and lack of sunshine.

And so, we begin the journey back toward the light. Toward a new year. This can feel hopeful – an embrace of possibility, of a clean slate.

But if you are feeling discouraged...
If you are struggling...
If you are grieving...
If you are feeling disconnected / hopeless / confused / fatigued...

...I want to remind you, fellow human: you are not alone.

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Winter is Coming

Winter is Coming

The cooler, overcast days of autumn have arrived in the Pacific Northwest. Winter is coming... and I'm daydreaming of that beach above in Mexico.

When I first moved to Seattle, I discovered that at this higher latitude, I struggle with something called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) during the dark winter months. I reject the term "disorder" as it simply feels like my biology is sending me a clear message that it loves sunshine and I have to consciously set myself up for success when the dimmer, shorter days arrive.

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The Bitter + The Sweet

The Bitter + The Sweet

The reality is that for all of life that is smooth, joyful, and exquisitely beautiful... life is also bumpy, horrifying, and heartachingly painful. We've all heard this in sayings such as "you don't get the sweet without the bitter". "Brutiful" is now in the Urban Dictionary. Wherever there is beauty, we never have to look too far to also see the brutal.

We know this.
We forget this.
And then life teaches us again.

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Weaving Grief

Weaving Grief

Life inevitably includes grief. Not maybe, but when. Many of us would probably choose to only embrace the golden orb of joy, if given a choice... but every one of us knows that, in our lifetime, we cannot and will not escape touching the shadowed face of sorrow.

Grief is a shapeshifter. It is both universal and profoundly personal. It is a natural aspect of being an awake and aware human being.

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Soul Tending

Soul Tending

It may be that we want to be anywhere but with that raw, honest, present moment reality. I would propose that getting quiet to listen inwardly might be one of the most brave things we do in our lives. We don't always like what we see. We don't always want to see what we've buried there. Or, we know exactly what is in there, and know we aren't ready to be with it fully. Sometimes we don't want to listen when that damn internal wisdom speaks; we had other plans!

But there is also broad potential for healing and growth there in the fertile soil of stillness.

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Spring is Coming

Spring is Coming

Looking around, here, too, are the first cheerful daffodils and the earliest blush of cherry blossoms. The birds, suddenly busier with song and nest building. The sun, a little more visible in the gray Pacific Northwest sky, plays peek-a-boo; the clouds, full of drama and random hail storms. Daylight stretches out like a caress, minute-by-minute, with each passing day. I, myself, feel a desire arising to play in the pots of dirt in my rooftop garden.

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The Why

The Why

Hello from a tiny town next to a big ocean. I am here for on annual self-guided solitude retreat, where I spend delicious amounts of time in silence (save the soundtrack of ocean waves & rain), soul tending, and dreaming up the coming year of offerings for you.

A new year has arrived with reminders – both inspiring (Wow, Georgia!) and horrible (the attempted coup) – that we remain on the ragged, living edge of (r)evolution, and there is much work to do.

I, myself, have been recently reflecting (again) on why we rest. Why do I so passionately advocate and hold space multiple times a week, week after week, for our community to rest? Why rest when it is clear that there continues to be so much need for action?!

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Permission to Do Less

Permission to Do Less

This year has been chock-full of distraction, distancing, and drama. As it comes to a close, may you find yourself giving and receiving Presence. I believe this to be the most powerful and valuable gift we can give ourselves – and others.

Recently, something occurred to me for the first time: to hold Presence in any given moment, there is nothing I need. It is not doing a thing; it is not having a thing; I do not need to acquire / find / buy / know anything, or feel a certain way.

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Miracles

Miracles

Do you remember that you are a miracle?

You are the manifestation of your ancestors' dreams. Ridiculously tiny mathematical odds led to exactly your person being exactly here and now, where you sit, breathe, and read these words.

I recently read that for you to be born from the past 12 generations you needed a total of 4,094 ancestors over the past 400 years. The probability of you existing at all comes out to nearly zero!

Take a moment to let that sink in.

Why do I bring this up? Because each of us alive today stands on the ragged edge of evolution, descended from a long line of change agents. It is a miraculous gift that we are here, now!

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Vote. And stay rested.

Vote. And stay rested.

There is – and will continue to be – important, sea change work to do! This year has leveled up the wakeup call. I guarantee that your community and this planet needs YOU. And they need you healthy, vibrant, focused, and sustainable.

In service of this – our collective community wellbeing – I will keep shouting from the mountaintops: REST IS ESSENTIAL!!

Rest is a key survival skill of the 21st Century... and I've yet to meet anyone who doesn't need more of it. Rest is not just sleep (although sleep is necessary for a well-rested human). It's not just naps. It's not scrolling or screen time. It's not distraction. It is the opposite of distraction.

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What’s right?

What’s right?

Have you noticed how easy it is to fixate on “what’s wrong”? Or that bad news makes more headlines than good news? Or that insults or slights stick in your craw more than praise? Our human brains are literally wired for something psychology researchers call “negativity bias”. This means we often remember traumatic experiences more vividly than positive ones, think about negative things more frequently than positive ones, perceive bad news as more truthful than good news (!!), and react more strongly to negative stimuli. The scientific theory is that this is an evolutionary function of our brain's constant need to frame all of life through its survival lens – it’s always trying to keep us safe from potential danger. Negativity bias can adversely skew how we think, respond, feel, and make decisions – from a place of fear and pessimism, rather than discernment and consideration.

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Perspective

Perspective

There is much on my mind and in my heart these days, friends. Yours, too, I know. I hope that you and yours are finding love and support... and remembering how critical it is to take downtime. We have more to do. I am using my particular position of privilege in the world to listen, learn, watch, donate, collaborate, and last – but never least – to hold space for others listening, rest, and healing.

I've recently returned from a two-and-a-half week cross country road trip from Seattle to New Mexico, and back. I'd like to share one of the insights that came from witnessing breathtaking geological marvels formed by inconceivable eons of erosion, plate tectonics, and climate change: Everything is changing – all the time. Nothing is static, immutable, or forever – not even a mountain. There is slow, steady, imperceptible change; urgent, violent, disruptive change; change that comes without warning; change that simmers and hints, a long time coming; change that unfurls wondrous before our eyes.

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All the feels

All the feels

I woke up today thinking "Yes, you can be grateful AND angry at the same time." Sometimes we need to remind ourselves that we have access to the entire wild spectrum of human experience at any given time... and that that fact can be both overwhelming AND a powerful tool for authentic connection. And that's where I'm at these days, my friends. Feeling all the feelings, combined with intermittent fatigue, overwhelm, and confusion, doing the best I can to take care of myself and others, as I ride this new world rollercoaster with all of you.

How are you? What are you doing to stay resilient? What have you given up? What have you gained? Are you taking naps? This is a remarkable time for our brains and bodies, and they need more rest because they're under stress and expending precious energy adapting to a new not-normal.

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Resilience

Resilience

Whether you are working with renewed or expanded commitments keeping our communities safe and functional, honoring a stay-at-home order by limiting your normal actions, in quarantine, and/or home with your children trying to figure out how to home school — every one of us needs time dedicated to quieting our nervous system; keeping our immune system strong; connecting with our own body, heart, and mind; and refilling the inner well.

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Summer Sweetness

Summer Sweetness

Summer skies and temperatures are pretty much perfection up here in the Pacific Northwest! The cherries, peaches, and pluots have been blowing my mind. I've managed to get out of the city and into the mountains backpacking for several long nourishing weekends. I've gone swimming in lakes, and even tried out SUP (Stand Up Paddle) boarding for the first time! And in the midst of all of this savoring joy and abundance, I've found it challenging to carve out actual rest time.

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Dig deep.

Dig deep.

I've spent a lot of last past year letting go. Again. And creating space. Again. Renewal is always and constantly a process. It is non-linear, often iterative, adaptive, and seldom as simple as we'd like it to be. I could make, as many others have, a strong case that life is cyclical; an ebb and flow of opening and closing; of letting go and reaching out; recurring creation and destruction; of inhaling and exhaling. And with any and all forms of letting go, spaciousness, freedom, and the capacity for something new arises. For me, yoga and movement have been and continue to be a resource for being in mindful connection with and observation of this cycle within my own life.

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